Dying Trekkie's Eyes
MILFORD, CT—Moments before dying, car-accident victim and hardcore Star Trek fan Glenn Schaefer saw Captain James T. Kirk's life flash before his eyes. "It's all coming back to me," said Schaefer, bleeding profusely and fading from massive head trauma. "The Salt Vampires of M-113, assisting Spock through the Pon Farr, outmaneuvering Khan Singh in the Mutara Nebula, the dilithium mines of Rura Penthe. I'm even seeing portions of the animated series and the Lost Years novels." Before taking his final breath, Schaefer turned to attending medical personnel and said, "It was... fun."
No Clear Winner In Feces-Throwing Conflict
TABORA, TANZANIA—After several hours of fierce feces-slinging from both sides, no clear winner emerged Tuesday in the conflict between Tabora-area male silverback gorillas Lugo and Kamala. "While Lugo looked strong early on, heaving large quantities of his own dung at his opponent, Kamala came back with an equally impressive volley of his own," primatologist Dr. Donald Schayes said. "We might not have a clear handle on the outcome until mating season." The animals have tentatively scheduled an additional series of fecal flings over the next three weeks.
[ taken from http://www.theonion.com ]
Okay, and I will also be logging some n00bz in AOL RP (yes, I know AOL suxx0rz, but unfortunately, I have to use it until I get cable modem) rooms. They're really funny, and hopefully I can find the ones who are n00bz at 1337!